Deviantart Sucks Sometimes!

So Deviantart does suck sometimes! They've taken down a picture or a bug prevents it from being seen, but if I try to resubmit it, then it says I have one already with that title! Psh, go figure!
Anyway, since I did it intending it to be the size it uploads on here, I'll upload it here =D

Just a picture done to a song I love <3

'tis called "Barely Breathing"

It's not my usual style, but I like it anyway! <3

My Wishes and my Dreams

So, this is going to be a partly very serious and partly very random posts - and I'd like to start with the random.

Lately I've been getting a full 12 hours of sleep a night. I feel the need to explain here that I am not as lazy as I sound - I went home for the christmas holidays and barely slept at all, let alone well. Anyway, my not-entirely-bullshit-excuse aside, I have been dreaming more than I ever have. I'm not sure if it's sheer length of sleep means more dreams generally so I'm more likely to remember them or something different, but it is unavoidable truth that I'm remembering more or dreaming more.

Having said that, I can't help but notice that my dreams are all very similar. They all leave me waking up in the morning rather like this:

Which often happens when I dream anyway, but as I'm remembering more of my dreams, I'm also remembering their content much better. Most people dream of loved ones or hated ones or dinosaurs or flying. Not me, oh no! I dream of colours. Many many colours, all with mind-numbing capabilities that make me feel like I'm tripping out (and you know they're impressive when your dream-self feels like they're tripping.). Inside my dream looks something like this (without the faces. I don't know why I added the faces):

Which is all good and well, but I'm aware of the fact that my dream-self isn't enjoying this trip as much as it perhaps could be. Now I don't know whether this is for some deep subconscious meaning like "I can't stand the idea of standing out", or "I don't enjoy being a bold person", but inside this dream I'm definitely not having fun. But it doesn't feel like a nightmare. My sheer "WTF"-ness overwhelms any other particular emotional response. Just to make it clear, this is how I picture my dream eating my mind from the outside world, while I innocently sleep away:

So yes, there it is, Monstar Colourz eating mah brainz. I'm thinking the dreams will just go away once I've had enough sleep that I don't sleep for a full 12 hours. Then I might wake up instead of dreaming. Can't wait... o_o;

Anyway, onto the more serious thing I said I'd do! I have to admit I only named this blog "My Wishes and my Dreams" because it sounded cool and I wrote it without thinking, and so the dreams bit is mostly irrelevant except that it is happening now.
What I wanted to post was my wishes for 2011, and I hope I gave you enough humour with my dreams that you'll forgive my serious lack of 'lulz'.

What I Wish for 2011:

I wish that I can have the courage to say what I mean, even if that isn't necessarily something people want to hear.

I wish that I can have the foresight to do my work ahead of time, or at least on time so that I don't get stuck working all night at the last minute.

I wish that I can hold onto my friends but also find the confidence to strike out and make new ones.

I wish that I can set aside time for myself each day, without thinking that I'm wasting that time.

I wish that I can become more confident in myself, both in how I feel and how I look.

I wish that I can be more selfless, but know when it's okay not to be.

I wish that I can make mistakes without criticizing myself unfairly.

I wish that I can take my past and work it out.

I wish that I can work up the courage to admit it's okay to need help, and then to ask for it.

I wish that by next year, I'll believe in myself enough that I can wish for other people.




Happy new year, everyone!